Bloodsucker

Well kids, it's time! You knew it would happen eventually! I'm talking about a vampire post. So here it is.

I have an odd preoccupation with vampires. Many of you might think that it is new as they are ever present in pop culture right now. However, it began long ago in a time called the 1980s with a show called "Sesame Street". That's right! I said "Sesame Street". One Mr. Count Von Count triggered my unhealthy obsession, turned fear, turned back to obsession. I loved the Count. I especially loved his tiny, sparkly, singing bat friends. You can find them on Youtube and refresh your memory. You will not be disappointed. They are ADORABLE!

I then, of course, moved on to "Buffy" and Anne Rice. For a time, I was convinced that vampires were real and therefore, became terrified of them. I'm over it now as most of you know. And, YES, I like "Twilight"! Just putting it out there! I love "Twilight"!

I'm sorry, did you just say "real" vampires don't sparkle? Did you really just say that? Think about that for a minute and then tell me why that statement is a problem...I'll wait...got it? Ok good.

Here's my theory. IT'S FICTION PEOPLE!!! And there is room for everyone. So don't hate! Especially if you're a "Harry Potter" or "LOTR" fanatic because my brain just cannot handle why those pop culture cult phenomenon are more legitimate.

In conclusion, friends, I doubt that this will be the last vampire related post, but I thought I would ease you in with a little background and a few disclaimers.

Circus Freaks

Ok...for real...does anyone NOT find clowns frightening? Were clowns ever not terrifying or was there a time when they were actually as beloved as they think they are? Was it "It" and John Wayne Gacy that ruined them? I have a feeling that the answer is a resounding NO!

I confess that once upon a time, while working at Borders(moment of silence) I hid in the back while there was a clown in the store and would not come out until she was gone. Why are clowns so scary you ask? I have no idea. I think it has something to do with the fact that you can't see their faces because I don't like mimes either.

I did find an article on VH1's website listing the top 10 reasons why clowns are scary. I hope you enjoy it.

http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008-01-16/the-top-10-reasons-clowns-are-scary/

Robo takeover...

Though I do enjoy things of a darker nature, I will share a fear of mine that has been coming up all day today! Robots. I am petrified of robots. Not in the abstract sense, but in the "I Robot", takeover the world sense. No, the sight of a robot does not make me cry and wet myself. It is just the possibility that robots could overcome their programming and overpower those that made them.

This is something that has been touched on in many movies and TV shows. I feel as though there is a distinct possibility that this could actually happen. I, for one, am ready to take the planet back when it happens!

Who's with me world? Who's ready to take down "The Terminator"? I am ready to be your Sarah Connor!

Pretty Pictures

So I'm sure by now you're seeing a theme. Darkness...muwahahaha...I'm really not as goth as I seem. Kind of like Marilyn on "The Munsters". I'm only spooky on the inside. But...on to today's topic.

I have a weird fascination with Victorian-era post-mortem photography. At first, I know, this sounds SUPER creepy but I can't get enough of it. I think it has something to do with the fact that these people posed their dead and took family portraits. It is strange and makes sense all at the same time. During a time when there wasn't money for taking pictures (as it was quite expensive) you want to have a last memory of that person. I cannot even imagine doing something like that now!

Everytime I see these photos I think to myself, "That's weird! Stop looking at that!" my morbid curiosity and the desire to understand what people were thinking way back when gets the best of me. So, next time you're doing something that you think is totally bizarre, not to worry, my friend, you are not alone!

Phobiaphobia

For those that don't know, I have somewhat of a taste for the macabre. I have noticed a pattern as an adult that I have a tendency to become fascinated with things that I once feared. One good example, of course, is vampires. Those of you who even know me a little are rolling your eyes right now and I love you all for putting up with my antics and accepting me anyway.

One thing that many people do not know it that I was once terrified of vampires. I used to have nightmares when I was a little girl that everyone on the planet had been turned and I was the only human left.

So today's post is a roundabout dedication to overcoming fear! (Okay so I will probably never love spiders but I no longer scream like a little girl when I see a small one) And I will list some of the more fun ones that belong on the "Maury Povich" show. And now that I have just dated myself, here are some of my favorites:

Alliumphobia- Fear of garlic(in sticking with the vampire theme of course)
Anglophobia- Fear of England or English culture, etc.
Coprastasophobia- Fear of constipation.
Geniophobia- Fear of chins.
Lachanophobia- Fear of vegetables.
Lutraphobia- Fear of otters. (Really?! Otters? They are possibly the most adorable animal EVER!)
Omphalophobia- Fear of belly buttons.

Zombies attack in the morning!

For my first post, I will share a slightly embarrassing yet hilarious story that some of you have already heard. My disclosure is that last week was an exhausting work week for me(my coworkers will attest to this!). So here goes...

I was driving to work last Thursday morning and was stopped at a red light. I could see a woman in the mirror of the car in front of me. Her head was upright, but she must have been looking down because I could only see her eyelids. In my energy-depleted brain, however, she had no eyes and was clearly a zombie! Aaaahh!

Anyone who knows me knows my affinity for all things vampire. My first thought was, "She's a zombie! I don't know how to kill a zombie!" Now this all happened in just a moment, but for that one terrifying second, I was ready to defend the planet from zombies!

You're welcome, World!